Lately, I have read a lot of articles and posts about avoiding Facebook. Now I can understand avoiding Facebook from a "time" perspective, because it can be a time-suck. It can also be distracting from spending actual face-to-face time with real humans. But the reason people tend to suggest avoiding Facebook is because it makes people feel bad about themselves. We all know Facebook is a place for people to post the fun and celebratory moments of our lives. Occasionally, people post sad moments and disappointing moments, but it's mostly a place for happy things. And perhaps some of the posts are to present an image. But who cares? That's the beauty of being able to scroll past those. I truly believe that most of the posts are to just share great life moments with family and friends. But either way, it brings me to this point.
Why does it bother us that people are posting happy things? Perhaps because we feel inadequate? Oh, Sarah, made herb-crusted rack of lamb. I made oatmeal. Julie's children eat lamb. Mine eat lollipops. Heather has time to knit her children sweaters. I sent my kids to school in tank tops...when it's 45 outside. Greg and Julie went to Aspen. I'm still trying to get us to the park. You know how it goes.
We (and by we, I really mean women) need to work on feeling happy and confident in the path we choose for ourselves and our families. There is too much in life that falls on our shoulders for us to spend what little energy we have left doubting ourselves. The leader of my mom group, which I mention frequently, calls this Celebrating Your Capacity. And I think that's awesome. My capacity may be great when it comes to my working life, but I can tell you my capacity sucks when it comes to cooking. I don't cook. Period. Thankfully, my husband does cook, but if he chooses to take a night off, I am super fine with ordering Chinese. I don't have a great capacity at this stage to volunteer. I'm too busy with two little kids, work, and my husband. But I think it's great that others do. Hopefully, they will give me tips when my kids get a little older of great places to volunteer. I don't have great capacity to dote on my husband (I hope he celebrates that capacity), but I say "Rock on" to those women who do. I don't garden. I don't make homemade cookies. I mean, let's be clear, in my mind "slice and bake" is homemade (and even that I don't do very often). I am so, so fine with both of those things.
So women, I say be proud about who you are and what you have accomplished with your family. And celebrate your capacity and celebrate other's capacities! They aren't all the same, and that is so okay. Be happy for your friend who just ran a marathon even if you haven't worked out in 2 years, because you have probably done something amazing (like read your kids 4000 books at bed time) that another woman out there is envying.
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